How to Handle the Graduate School Application Process

Handling rejection, coping with stress, and learning to set boundaries in an environment that’s often hostile to our humanity.

Photo by Max Shilov on Unsplash

I am a social psychologist, clinical assistant faculty member at Loyola University Chicago, and the author of the book Laziness Does Not Exist. Over the past few years, I have written extensively about the harm done by the Laziness Lie, an unspoken, yet pervasive cultural belief system that preaches the following:

1. Your worth is determined by your productivity

2. You cannot trust your needs and limitations

2. There is always more that you could be doing.

The Laziness Lie has a deep and troubling history, dating back to chattel slavery and the dawn of European imperialism. To this day, the belief that failure or exhaustion is a sign of immoral ‘laziness’ haunts us in the workplace, in our personal relationships — and in our educational system, particularly higher ed.

For me, graduate school was one of the spaces most deeply poisoned by the Laziness Lie. As a graduate student I was worked to the bone, for very little money, and I watched as my peers were shamed or driven to drop out for things like suffering from…