That’s a hard one! I think there’s two routes, right — either incentivizing it on a micro level, or persuading him to see it as important to do thing that aren’t fun on a macro level. I think probably both have their role — when it comes to chores, he made need to see what happens if chores are ignored, to get a sense of why such an un-fun activity is nonetheless vital. You could refuse to pick up his slack, if you think him witnessing the ensuing mess will help him to understand why it needs to get done. Or, you could explain to him that doing things that aren’t fun are a core part of life and essential to relationships — if he ever lives with a friend, a roommate, or a romantic partner, he will be seen as inconsiderate and selfish (for understandable reasons!) if he doesn’t do his fair share. You can also have conversations about how indulging only in things that feel “fun” can actually be really depressing without structure and the sense of reward that comes from working hard on something. I’m not sure if any of these will appeal to him, but you’d have a better sense of that I suppose.

On a more micro level, you can try to examine what he does find motivating and fun, and what things make doing chores more difficult. I’m not a parent, and I’m sure you have already tried a lot of things, so I’m sorry if any of this is very obvious advice! But I think putting structures in place that make chores a daily or weekly practice, and tying them to something that he needs or wants — like access to the wi-fi or the car keys — can help really push him to get it together. Keep up the hard work, I know dealing with a teenager not wanting to do chores sucks and is exhausting and frustrating, but the world desperately needs more conscientious men who clean and think about the needs of other people, and every time you push him to be better, you are improving his odds of having loving, fair relationships in the future.

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