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The Ethics (& Tactics) of Telling Someone You Think They’re Autistic
(Also relevant if you want to successfully crack a closeted trans person’s egg).
Online, the ethicality of labeling a public figure as Autistic without them having publicly claimed the label is a subject of some debate. Neurodivergent fans (being obsessive catalogers of our favorite Blorbos’ every mannerism and personal factoid) have a tendency to pattern-match our own experience onto those of our faves, and speculate excitedly that these parasocial besties might just be one of us.
When I get to feeling loose and unfiltered, I am certainly in the habit of doing it — and not just about public figures that I like. On livestreams and on Tumblr (where I tend to censor myself less), I have speculated that everybody from Taylor Swift to Grimes to Ron DeSantis is Autistic, alongside probably a dozen celebrities whom I actually like.
It can be therapeutic! Seeing that some of the traits of ours that are most highly stigmatized are actually present in individuals who are socially beloved or rewarded for being unique and strange feels good; representation helps to normalize difference and expand the realm of what is considered possible. It’s also tempting to see our highly maligned disability as a possible source of strength, and to…
