Wow, our experiences dovetail so much! I was also afraid that people would think I was ‘stealing’ their identity or their look in some way, or that I’d seem parasitic. I was also worried that my cis gay male friends would think I was just… what? Some over-obsessed f*g hag that had taken it too far? Which is absurd now that I think about it. But those were real concerns back in the day. It was easiest to see myself as ace, and functionally the ace label was true for me at the time. Which is not to say that ace isn’t also a valid and enduring label for many, of course.

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